26-year-old man's clown doll collection drives girlfriend to issue ultimatum, demands he redocorate his apartment:"Either get ride of them, or we're done"

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  • 01

    AITA telling my girlfriend to "Sk it up" around my clown figurines?

    "Your obsession with clowns was charming before, but now it's just disturbing."
  • 02
    Me (26M) and my girlfriend (24F) have been dating for 2 years. Since we started dating she's KNOWN that I love clowns. I have several porcelain clowns displayed around my house on walls, hung from the ceiling on little swings, and on shelves. I adore these weird little creatures.
  • 03
    Well last week I bought 2 Venetian masks from the thrift store and they're in GREAT condition (I got em for a decent price too). She HATES them. She said they're creepy and give her "bad vibes" whatever that means.
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  • 05
    I told her that I would take down the masks when she's staying the night, but I'm not getting rid of them. She told me that was fine.
  • 06
    Yesterday she got up and told me that we needed to talk. She told me that she's sick of seeing my weird decorations and clown toys everywhere. That they're ugly and creep her out. I asked her where
  • 07
    this was all coming from because she has NEVER MENTIONED MY CLOWNS BEFORE and she said me 'bringing those ugly masks into our home was her last straw!' and 'my obsession with clowns was charming before, but now it's just disturbing'.
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  • 09
    I told her that I would take down the masks when she was over. But, 1. This isn't OUR home. It's MY apartment. And 2. She's known about the clowns for years. And to try to stop me from decorating my place how I please is controlling.
  • 10
    She told me "Either get rid of some of them or were done". I told her to just "s k it up" while she's here. And if she can't then I'll come to HER place every week.
  • 11
    She didn't like that answer and called me a child before leaving. I texted her to apologize for telling her to sk it up about the clowns. But she hasn't responded to me. So. Am I the a hole for telling her to "s k it up" about my clown figurines?
  • 12
    Fun_Effective6846 NTA. As someone who isn't into clowns but loves Venetian masks, I can understand being creeped out by some of them. However, her turning this on your entire interest for clowns that you've had your whole relationship makes her TA.
  • 13
    Also, if she's giving you ultimatums over how you decorate your own space based on your own interests, she's not the one. There will be someone who will appreciate your collection, if not add to it themselves.
  • 14
    EndFlimsy5850 OP That's the crazy thing! She has bought me little clowns before! She found a print of 2 clowns kissing at an art fest she went to and she picked it up for me.
  • 15
    Anxious_Reporter_601 Hate to be this person, but is there any chance she might be looking for a reason to break up?
  • 16
    Relevant Turnip_7538 Good thing you found this out about her now. It isn't going to last. You're NTA right now, because it *is* your place, but if the relationship progresses, you're likely to have a place together, and then she won't
  • 17
    allow it, and you'll be right back at this point, but with more feelings. better to cut bait now and both get on with your lives. Find someone tolerant who doesn't care what your hobby is, and you can put up with her creepy 18th century gothic porcelain doll collection too.
  • 18
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  • 19
    wackyvorlon Might even find someone who loves clowns as much as he does. Then they can just revel in clowns.
  • 20
    curiouslycaty Precisely. I like blue a lot. And I don't mean that in the normal way. Right now I'm sitting on my blue couch in a blue dress drying my blue hair with my blue towel and blue hairdryer.
  • 21
    I found me someone who doesn't just tolerate blue, but actually loves it as much as I do. I don't have to compromise on something that I really love, and my partner loves blue too and doesn't mind me buying everything in blue.
  • 22
    wackyvorlon You two don't sound compatible.
  • 23
    EndFlimsy 5850 OP I really don't want that to be the case. This is a new problem. She's never been weirded out by my collection until now.
  • 24
    MaineRonin13 No, she's been weirded out by them since the beginning. Adding these two new masks was just the tipping point.
  • 25
    plantprinses From a purely pragmatical point of view: this is your apartment and therefore you have every right to decorate it in the way you want. That is not controlling at all. You would be controlling if you wanted to decorate your gf's apartment with
  • 26
    clowns. From a relationship point of view: you are just not compatible. If the presence or absence of decorative objects is such an issue in your relationship that ultimatums are involved, I shudder to think how you both will manage when far more challenging issues come up.
  • 27
    riontach I think she steps into AH territory because of her delivery, but honestly it just sounds like you guys are not compatible. This probably came up in the first place because she is thinking about the future and what it would be like to live together and realizing that that isn't going to work.
  • 28
    Sapphirethistle Probably NTA but (and it's just my own opinion) clowns are horrifying.
  • 29
    alien_overlord_1001 NTA like what you like but I don't actually know anyone who wants to live in the creepy clown house so don't be surprised if you have trouble finding another girlfriend.....
  • 30
    Flat-Let-8622 nta you gave her options if she didnt like your decorations and she refused them honestly dude id break up with her also your clown house sounds sick

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